Game-changing Relationship Advice From Top Couples Therapists

If you’ve known each other for a while, you may assume that your partner has a pretty good idea of what you are thinking and what you need. While your partner may have some idea, it is much healthier to express your needs directly to avoid any confusion. A study found that experiential gifts strengthen the relationship between gift giver and receiver much more than material gifts. This is true regardless of whether they “experience” the gift together or not. So does this mean you can’t do anything special if you want to develop a deep bond with others around you? Simply talk about the experience with them in relatable terms.

Improve Your Relationships To Improve Your Total Quality Of Life

Saying “I love you” is one of the most crucial things to do to make your relationship stronger. Holding hands, a hug, and a squeeze on the arm create connection and trust. Let it be known if you’re not getting as much attention as you want. Watch this video by Susan L. Adler, a relationship counselor to understand the how to make a relationship strong and happy. How to keep a relationship strong and happy doesn’t need to be a long, winding, complex process.

When there is a fight, do not bring up another argument or problem from the past. Deal with it right now because that’s what really matters at the moment! If you keep bringing up other things, your partner will think that you’re still mad at him/her and won’t be able to resolve problems effectively. Spend time together whenever possible and talk about any problem that bothers you; be open enough (and at the same time, sensitive) to understand where your partner stands.

Some strategies to try include active listening, compromise, honesty, and LoveFort communication. More specific advice can depend on the reasons your relationship is damaged. Psychological research shows that partners who play together experience more positive emotions and report greater happiness.

Ways To Keep Your Relationship Strong, Healthy, & Happy

• Small gestures of appreciation, shared laughter, and exploring new activities can also strengthen your bond.
• And even if you do know what you need, talking about it can make you feel vulnerable, embarrassed, or even ashamed.
• Affectionate contact boosts the body’s levels of oxytocin, a hormone that influences bonding and attachment.
• Check in with each other during the day—it doesn’t take much time or effort on your part to ask someone how they’re doing, how the day is going.
• When researchers at the University of Michigan studied almost 3,000 married couples, they found that those with similar drinking habits enjoyed happier lives together.

First of all, take time every day to talk to each other beyond the routine niceties. Check in with each other during the day—it doesn’t take much time or effort on your part to ask someone how they’re doing, how the day is going. As human nature goes, people settle into life and sometimes forget what it took to be in relationship in the first place. They may fall down on the job of tending to the relationship and to their partner.

We fall into schedules of work/cooking/housework/sleep with little variety, except for obligatory holidays. Instead, make a point of celebrating things on a regular basis. This gives you occasions to look forward to, and opportunities for fun and joy with your beloved. Different people cope with stress differently, and misunderstandings can rapidly turn to frustration and anger. Commit to spending some quality time together on a regular basis. No matter how busy you are, take a few minutes each day to put aside your electronic devices, stop thinking about other things, and really focus on and connect with your partner.

Ways To Improve Your Relationships (and Build Deeper Connections)

It is also one of the easiest ways to show that you care for each other. Big life changes—like becoming parents, changing careers, moving, or coping with loss—can strain even the healthiest of relationships. The stress can lead to distance, resentment, or misunderstanding if not handled with care. Brain scans showed that the stress of being shocked was lower when the woman was holding anybody’s hand. But when the woman was holding her husband’s hand, the calming effect was even greater and was similar to the effect of a pain-relieving drug. The benefit of holding hands was particularly pronounced among women who had the highest marital happiness scores.

With 150+ interviews, 500+ articles, and a new video podcast, I hope I am on the right track. Of course, this doesn’t mean you need to find ways to suffer together! But if you have the opportunity to do an intense fitness class, a long day of volunteering, or a difficult task together, you might come out with a much stronger connection for it. The second part of the study has great news for all the busy folks out there.

It doesn’t have to take a long time or be the “perfect” message. Just let them know you’re thinking of them and that you’re glad they’re in your life. The next time you’re upset with your partner, write down the thoughts you’re having about them (this exercise builds on the first practice, above). Use these cognitive approaches to train your thoughts in directions that strengthen your relationship. Don’t worry that you need to brainwash yourself or practice positive fictions about your relationship (e.g., “My partner is perfect in every way”). CBT aims for accuracy and usefulness, not being overly positive.